hey everyone ❤️

I am not really sure what to title this blog post, when to upload it or anything.

But as usual, my blog here is just for fun but also just the fact that if I could help one person with advice based on my life experiences and all that good stuff then it would be a successful blog post.

Also I’m not sure if this is everyone’s cup of tea, some might find it too soppy or others might find it controversial, disclaimer – this post is not by any means to throw shade at anybody, I will not be mentioning names or any of that it will be just my experience and how I deal with this today.

So let’s just go –

I was in a relationship for two and a half years and we broke up a few months ago. How did I start from square one again? Move on?

I lost someone who I did everything with, invested two and a half years of my life with one person, talked about them, thought about them and did whatever in my power I could do to make them laugh and happy.

Most importantly, I lost my best friend in the whole entire world.

So what does that have to do with a blog post? Really what I’m trying to do is help anybody who has been broken up with, anyone who broke up with someone or maybe just someone out there who may be thinking of doing so but feels obliged to stay with the person they’re currently with.

Obviously not going to go into details of the breakup because irrelevant but thankfully ours was sad but mutual, also – on good terms.

So I suppose my advice may not suit to all people but I mean it’s pretty general so should be easy to follow.

Time –

Everyone says it, but it really is the key – it will certainly not be today, tomorrow or even two weeks / months time.

Even if you’re the one to break up with someone, you still have to live your life without them. Doesn’t mean it won’t hurt.

Time is so slow and painful but trust me, down the line all the tears and sad feeling in your heart will ease and make it all worth while.

Social media –

Sounds weird but in a non hateful way, get each other blocked from the get go on social media platforms, we live in such a technological orientated age that you know more about one another when seeing their profiles rather than actually talking to them in person.

It will feel better not checking up on one another, out of sight – out of mind.

In time, who knows, you may be able to be friends again but for the beginning anyways get each other hidden from one another.

Mindset –

You need to have a positive mindset.

I know easier said than done but look – if you cannot make someone happy anymore than you need to let them go free, find themselves or to find exactly what they’re looking for (and sadly) for them to look for what you couldn’t give them.

You need to know that you were probably living a life where you programmed yourself where you thought you were happy.

Bickering in nightclubs, the effort that ye had for one another before gone, things not being the same, being with them for so many years, that’s not love, that’s settling.

It is quite cliche – but there are plenty of more fish in the sea, you will find another person with the love you wish to receive and give.

Also – have the mindset that they also need to be happy.

if you’re both not happy, or even just one not being happy – what’s the point?

I mean, (okay I hate the word) but my ex and I don’t talk anymore but I would be happy for him if he found happiness one day, the best opportunities and experiences there are out there.

I hope he feels the same for me but that’s just an example of mindset, I know in my heart we weren’t making each other happy anymore so if I have the mindset that one day I will be happy as will he, the feelings I was feeling at the time were worth it and feel worth it today.

Friends –

What would I have done without my beautiful friends, I have so many different groups and homies from all around the block but my day ones really knocked it out of the park this time.

Someone to talk to, chill and attend things with, chats, tea, hugs, food and a whole lot of love!

I don’t even need to say names because these people know well who they are, I owe everything to ye after the support I have gotten in all ways the last few months.

The last few months I have been on three holidays (one of them being a conference but still), been to four concerts with another in Dec, just going out and doing things because I feel like it and because I want to.

Okay don’t get me wrong – I am as mad as a bag of spiders anyways when it comes to going out and I have always been an independent person in terms of attending things as I want to get myself out there a lot already but still, I just live my life and I am not being held back by anybody.

I want to be with someone in the future that lets me spread my wings, treats me like a princess but rides the wave with me at the same time.

I really enjoy myself, I love me time – I have a nice level of self love and I know my potential to make some guy v happy some day but to be honest, I am content in this moment in time to just be 21 years of age and to live my life.

That’s what you gotta do! book things and have something to look forward to, see the world, look around you, meet new people, taste new food and step out of that comfort zone!!

Just be you for awhile, get to know that person you feel you lost.

Take up a new hobby, go to the gym, start watching a new show – just kick back and breathe for a second.

You. Do. You.

My fav tip for feeling sad – music and tea, makes you more sad but eventually it’ll make you feel better.

Also extra tips – pics of cute animals (preferably puppies and dogs), showers, long journeys with earphones in, tea, naps and memes.

Finally in this long piece, I didn’t write this post for sympathy or for anyone to know my business, it’s purely just for advice and I didn’t really give much detail on the actual breakup.

Also, everyone has different ways of moving on but my main advice is to stay away from the drama, for your own sake .

Ooooh also advice for sadness – Gordon Ramsay videos.

This post may be stupid but you don’t know, someone out there may needs the advice.

As per if anyone would ever like to chat or need advice, don’t be afraid to drop me a bell ❤️

Lots of love to anyone who reads my posts, me pouring my heart of jibber sometimes might be annoying and lengthy to read but it hella means a lot when someone reads this ❤️

Ali xx